Dear Diseased, Dilapidated, and Defunct, Welcome back to the world of collecting bottlecaps! I’m pretty astonished that this is happening at all. So now every sport is going on at the same time. Luckily I have my computer and tablet and tv going all the time just to keep up!! Now for “A Tale of Two Cities” , uh, I mean “Two Cherries.” It was the best of times, the worst of times. So Cherry #1, Scumbuster, had the audacity to finish 2nd in his conference and to win his head to head. Already I’m hearing about where I dredged up this ringer. No worries. His Head will soon melt from all the chemicals he’s added to our water supply! Then there’s Cherry #2, ‘Bama. He’s really smart and experienced in the sporting world. Unfortunately, he tried to get the most points possible. You can thank my tutelage for encouraging that behavior! We also have some returning celebrities. DooDoo’s out of the toilet again. Gutterball returns averaging a spare every two frames. And adding to the returnees are Shroomer’s relatives, Fungi and Sir Luncelott. Both of them have been training at IMG School of Picks, advanced selections course. You all may have noticed Brain’s result. There’re two explanations—married and expecting!! Congrats!!! Special thanks to Shroomer and Mona for their dedication putting it all together with cunning and acumen. And thanks to our esteemed treasurer The Butt for her expert bottlecap counting. Bad Luck! The Commish It is better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.! Return