Dear Egocentrics and Fornicators, What could be more unlikely than Shroomer and the Flyers winning a week!? Perhaps, Jonah in the belly of a whale, or Moses parting the Red Sea, is more possible. Congrats and FYSM . . . I'm always encouraged because so many FYSMDPers support other FYSMDPers. That is why I need to introduce another entrepreneur of ours. In addition to her many daily responsibilities (like supervising Surge, Boa and G String), Hawk has opened a business to take full advantage of her strengths and also give aid to many of you: a Backseat Drivers' School!     Her beginners course introduces concepts of "Brake, you moron," "Slow down, stupid," etc. The advanced course uses techniques she has perfected on the males in her own family: slap the driver's head to alert him to your desires; scream in his ear loudly and often to get his attention; challenge the driver's sense of direction. She guarantees you'll be the envy of backseat drivers in your clique, and instill fear and obedience in males everywhere! A 10% discount is available to FYSMDPers. Do you know that your Commish, in addition to his huge FYSMDP salary, is also a sports agent? My newest signee allstar is Goober, who is already establishing himself as a brilliant sports prognosticator--first place in the Outlaw Line! I'm always on the lookout for such talent. You may be the world's greatest proof of reincarnation--no one could get this clueless in a single lifetime! Bad Luck, The Commish Return